You Are Human Too
Cut yourself some slack sometimes
Recently, I’ve been nagged a lot mentally, emotionally, and certainly physically too as I navigate the world of my toddler son. Being a first-time mom has been nothing fun like I always perceived from others. At first, I would be so hard on myself for not knowing and doing any better when it came to specific things I should already know by now. Such as when he’s fussing a lot and refusing food, he’s just teething. When he’s adamant about me carrying him, sometimes it’s just because his diapers are severely soiled, and when he’s overactive and seeks my attention too, he wants to be nursed to sleep (and yes, I still indulge him like that thanks for noticing).
But then again, not having any help, a nanny, or somebody to relieve me with some of these duties has been very daunting. Sometimes I wonder how I thought I could raise a child alone. But I’ve been doing it and I can do it- ish.
There’s one thing though I need to be aware of often. And so do you. Which is that I am human too. As much as I want to give my son all I have, I need to have something remaining of my own too. I need a reserve to tap into when it all feels depleted from catering for him. I need to take a back seat sometimes and act like I don’t know what’s going on to catch some breather. In all these, is realizing I need to exercise self-compassion the most. I want to bring it to the fore of my mind that I am doing the best I can, both as a human and a mother.
Therefore, If I’m sad and don’t want to pretend, I can shut it down. If I’m exhausted from the running around to keep things organized, it’s allowed. When I want to sleep all day for one week straight to be ridden of the exhaustive cycle and reality, it’s okay too.
Because I’m human too.
I need to cut myself some slack and understand that I’m the upgraded (adult) version of my son but not a superwoman.
I’ll continue to love and cater to him in many aspects needed, cuddle, play and bond with him, sometimes at my disposal — and other times, more frequently than not.
The most important thing for me is that I have a relationship where I truly understand my child and he truly gets me too. There are times when he knows I’ve done enough to soothe him and even though he won’t settle, he won’t disturb me either. That symbiotic relationship will eliminate resentment or feeling of abandonment from his head and mind — knowing fully well mummy is just having downtime and needs some time and energy to rise to the most involved, caring, protective mother, she could truly ever be. And embrace ourselves like that.
I am human, you’re human too. What are you beating yourself up so much for? How much blood, sweat, and time do you dedicate to that stuff on a regular in the first place? Just know when it starts, it’s proof you need to unwind, step down from being superhuman to just being human, and exercise some self-compassion through that. Forgive yourself often. With the belief that when it’s time again, you shall rise to anchor your life as magnificent as you’ve been doing.
Thank you for taking the time to read.