Honesty has more advantages than disadvantages (oh yes, there are disadvantages as well). These pros and cons are often manifested when in a relationship — with friends, a romantic partner, a business partner, and family members even. But the cons are normally underrated, which leads to a quick degradation of the said friendship/relationship — not without some heartaches.
Therefore the purpose of my article is to explain and validate your feelings of not being honest to certain somebodies and living freely.
Being honest to the wrong person is equal to being dishonest
When we are sincere to people who don’t care about our feelings, people who do not pay attention to our words, or people who neglect our actions, it is equal to being dishonest. This category of people will never remember the good in you and so everything you say is irrelevant to them. Choose to continue being honest with these people to the detriment of your mental health. Or tell them what they want to hear and keep “it” (whatever they mean to you) moving.
Being honest to the wrong people equals to being dishonest with yourself
There is a certain group of people to whom you might relate honestly and it instantly feels like you’re not being honest or true to yourself. For example, I’ve got a friend whom I used to tell the truth about my personal life and relationships too in depth. Each time I did, I didn’t realize I was giving her more cause to look down on me. And so I knew it was because I answered all the questions she asked me fully and honestly. As I started “tweaking” my stories and avoiding some of my questions, her respect for me increased explicitly.
Being honest with some people creates an avenue for self-doubt
In this case, the more honest you are about something, the less honest it sounds in your ears and heart. There are family members I tell the “truth” to about certain situations, and then it starts to ring “untrue” to my (inner) person almost immediately or much later. Those truths that make me ponder on them. I’m positive this might be the case for you too with these “certain” groups of humans.
Banding it together:
Words are delicate, once they’re out of the mouth, it’s a way to show what’s in the heart. Oftentimes the very sincere ones are being taken for granted. This can be disturbing, as though the world needs more fake and insincere people to thrive whereas it’s truly the other way round. Respect people that are honest to you, avoid people who make you speaking dishonestly or gaslights you to deviate from your true feelings.
#self-improvement #privacy #psychology
Thanks for taking the time to read
