Just Because Someone Tolerates You Does not Mean They Love You

Comet N.
2 min readAug 22, 2021


What is tolerance? And what is love?

Love incorporates tolerance. But tolerance on its own is the ability to sit through something unappealing or difficult.

Where do we draw the line between the two?

You’re tolerated only when other signs of love are missing — signs like respect, commitment, quality time, and other types of love language.

You’re loved when all of these are incorporated.

You feel tolerated when the things you do are easily let go. But you’re loved when your significant other deems it fit to discuss or hash out every issues you have.

You know you’re being tolerated when you hardly ever hear nice things about yourself except when you’ve done something nice or it’s convenient. Love, on the other hand, comes with unparalleled compliments and showers of praise every here and now even about the flimsiest things too.

You know you’re being tolerated when you’re generally not being taken seriously. The things you say, the things you do and believe in. But it’s love when every act of yours is intriguing to your significant other.

You’re being tolerated when you receive verbal warnings towards the end of a wrong deed, as opposed to discussing boundaries ahead of time, like if you were loved.

You’re being tolerated when you receive casual help here and there, most times culminating in a debt, which is antithetical to if you are loved — where actual favors and the acts of selflessness are mostly displayed.

Finally, you’re tolerated when you’re literally told so by your significant other, as opposed to if you’re loved where tolerance silently speaks for itself.

Let’s learn to differentiate tolerance from love and save us all the heartache that follows — or relish the newfound love that ensues.

PS- Love could be found in any type of relationship and orientation. So your significant other could be your friend, foe, or family.

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Comet N.

A girl who writes & addresses toxic hidden agenda in the form of topical issues whilst digesting their relative life lessons. I can't alone— It's a ‘let's all’.